


If the Sanzo Party stumbled upon fanfic

by Tommykaine



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Comedy, Crack, Exactly What It Says on the Tin, Gen, partially based on a true story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-07
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2020-01-06 07:34:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18383870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tommykaine/pseuds/Tommykaine
Summary: "Well I don't understand half of these labels, but a lot of them seem to be of a fairly crude nature", he told Jeep, scrolling through the stories in search of something that might suit his tastes a little more. "Oh, what about this one? 'Watersports'? Oh, I see! Maybe it's a funny story about a water fight! Ah, that might be fun to do, especially in such a torrid weather... I think I will read this one then". Hakkai smiled and clicked on the title.He read the whole thing in one go, his cheerful expression freezing on his face once he got to the end of it.It was not a funny story about a water fight.------Sanzo, Goku, Gojyo and Hakkai end up having access to a computer and learning about the, uhm, wonders of fanfiction.





	If the Sanzo Party stumbled upon fanfic

On their way to the West, during their stay in a particularly modernized city, the Sanzo party ended up stopping for a week in an inn that provided a special room with a computer for their guests to use, complete with online connection.

It was thanks to that, and thanks to the fact that a few certain sites were already memorized in the browser, that each member of the party ended up becoming acquainted with something they had never known to exist.

And that was, the wonderful world of online fanfiction archives.

 

 

Hakkai was the first one to stumble upon it, browsing through the long list with a mixture of fascination and confusion. Especially when he found a section that seemed to be dedicated to... well, a very familiar group of people.

"Well I don't understand half of these labels, but a lot of them seem to be of a fairly crude nature", he told Jeep, scrolling through the stories in search of something that might suit his tastes a little more. "Oh, what about this one? 'Watersports'? Oh, I see! Maybe it's a funny story about a water fight! Ah, that might be fun to do, especially in such a torrid weather... I think I will read this one then". Hakkai smiled and clicked on the title.

He read the whole thing in one go, his cheerful expression freezing on his face once he got to the end of it.

It was _not_ a funny story about a water fight.

He... wasn't quite sure of how to feel about that. Nor about the bulge that had unexpectedly appeared in his pants.

"Oh, boy", he said, scratching the back of his head with a nervous laugh. "What a discovery!"

 

 

Goku stumbled upon it entirely by chance, as he'd been looking for an online delivery service that offered nikuman after hearing someone talk about it earlier.

"Uh, what is this?".

Goku scrolled through the unknown list without understanding anything for a few minutes, then he saw a familiar word and gasped.

"Aaah, I see! Hakkai told me about this! It's a... uhh, collection of stories?", he rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "He said not to click on anything called 'watersports', but didn't want to tell me why! How weird".

He shrugged. Whatever, he didn't care too much. He also wasn't sure he wanted to read stories, as that would not help him get his beloved nikuman.

"Oh, maybe there are some stories about food!". That could have been interesting, right?. "Let's see... hmm... oh, what is this? 'Creampie'? Sounds delicious, I love pies, and cream! Yay!"

Twenty minutes later, Goku barged back in their room screaming, prompting Gojyo to throw an empty can of beer at him.

"Shut the fuck up! I was trying to take a nap".

"Waaah, it was so horrible! Hakkai! Why didn't you warn me about 'creampie'?!", Goku complained to the taller man, who chuckled and patted him on his shoulder with an expression that said 'whoops!'.

"Ooh, the little monkey has found online porn, huh?", Gojyo taunted him with a leering grin.

"Shut up you perverted kappa!"

"Ha ha ha, maybe I should start hiding my magazines now"

"Shut up! I'm not a shameless pervert like you!"

They kept going like that for a while and then the boy jumped on him and they started fighting, much to Hakkai's resignation. Especially when Sanzo came back from the bathroom, slammed the door open and started to fire gunshots at them while scolding them for the ruckus.

 

 

Gojyo didn't stumble upon it by accident, as by that point he'd already heard of it from both Goku and Hakkai, and was curious to see what it was all about.

He hadn't expected the section that Hakkai mentioned to be quite so large, someone must have put a lot of time and effort in writing all that!

"It's not even all porn. Though well... since I'm at it...".

After filtering to only keep the stories with adult content on the page, he resumed his exploration. He was kind of flattered to see his name appear on a good part of the stories. He was however less pleased to note that almost every time it was paired up with Hakkai's and the summary and tags clearly hinted at the fact that they were going at it. Though the worst was when he found the ones where he was paired with the damn monk! No way!

"I better be the top at least", he growled, angrily scrolling through the page in search of at least one story not involving him fucking one or more members of his own party. Or Kougaiji's party. Really all he wanted was to find one where he was fucking a girl, was that so much to ask?

"Maybe there's a filter for that too... aha! Found it!".

And then the first result that showed up, had him paired up with Kanzeon Bosatzu.

And he nearly flipped the whole table.

 

 

At some point, the three were discussing some of their findings when they saw Sanzo come back to the room with an uncharacteristic refreshed aura about him.

"Hey Sanzo! So did you find that website too?", Goku immediately asked. "There's a lot of scary stuff on it, isn't there?"

"Tsk. As if I'd be wasting time on something so pointless."

The man looked for a spare lighter, eventually stealing Gojyo's and heading out before the redhead could notice.

"Aah, that bastard! He better not lose it", Gojyo complained, while Hakkai rubbed his chin and looked unusually serious.

"There was something very odd about him just now, wasn't there?"

"Well... now that you mention it."

"Eeh? What are you two talking about?".

Gojyo and Hakkai shared a meaningful look.

"The computer room!"

They both rushed to it before Sanzo could come back, followed by a confused but very curious Goku.

"Let's see the browser history. Anything he's looked at or done, must be there", Hakkai determined, sitting down in front of the screen while the other two leaned down to look closely.

"Ooh if he's been reading some kind of weird-ass shit, I'll never let him live that down!", Gojyo said, hoping to find out about some of the man's embarrassing kinks so that he could tease him for it the next time the damn monk tried to sass him. He probably would get shot for it, but it would be worth it just to see the look on Sanzo's face as his secret shames were exposed.

"Oh? This is weird. It seems that rather than reading something he was... posting it?".

"What!?"

"Ehh? I hope there's no 'creampie' in it! Oh, or waterworks!"

Hakkai finally found the published story, and they all inched in closer to the screen - and simultaneously paled.

"Oi... this is... kinda bad", Gojyo said, gulping loudly and feeling a cold droplet of sweat fall down his face.

"Ahahah... well that is one way to let out some frustration, I guess", Hakkai said with a loud nervous laugh, while Goku also gulped and hid behind Hakkai.

"...wow, Sanzo sure can be scary!".

The story in question was actually a collection of shorts titled Going Out With A Bang, all of which seemingly involved Sanzo killing off each one of them in various gruesome ways every time they said or did something stupid, or somehow got on his nerves for an assorted number of reasons.

 

For the remaining days, Sanzo seemed to be in an unusually good mood, tolerating Gojyo's and Goku's shenanigans a lot more than he normally would. As for the rest of the party, they didn't say anything to him about their discovery, but were also a lot quieter and particularly kind towards the monk, who a few times seemed to get a bit suspicious but then shrugged and rolled with it, happy to get a break from the usual bullshit for a change.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> This story is part of the [LLF Comment Project](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including:
> 
> Feedback
> 
>   * Short comments
>   * Long comments
>   * Questions
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> I normally reply to all comments so if you do not wish for your comment to be replied to for any reason, please add "hush" somewhere in it and I will quietly appreciate it instead.


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